Ghost Writers in the Sky

 

Today on WIIA, we've got a real oldie for you – a Western classic – a song they sang out in the field as auditors gathered around the campfire after a hard day's work of reviewing paper files, completing twelve-column worksheets, and writing reports using paper and mechanical pencils.
 
An auditor came into work one drab and boring day
And at his desk he rested 'fore he started on his way.
When all at once a mighty surge of draft reports he saw
A-piling up upon his desk and clogging up his drawers.

The edits were on fire and the jargon carved in steel,
The red pen marks were bleeding and the hackwork he could feel.
A bolt of fear went through him as the pages fluttered by
For he saw the writers trudging by and he heard their mournful cry.
 
Yippie yi Yaaaaay
Yippie yi Ohhhhhh
Ghost writers in the sky

Their faces gaunt, their eyes were blurred, their shirts all soaked with sweat.
They're working hard to finish but the findings ain't out yet.
They have to write forever in that workplace in the sky,
Computers snorting fire, as they plod on hear their cry.
 
Yippie yi Yaaaaay
Work goes so slowwwww
Ghost writers in the sky
 
The auditors slogged by him and he heard one call his name.
"You think you're adding value but you're nothing but a pain.
You take mistakes and minor errors and call the impact high,
And count success by findings found and how many get fired."
 
"Well, auditor your ways must change or this will be your fate,
Preparing drafts and changing words and always being late.
You'll argue over commas, passive voice, and tenses past,
And change it back the way it was, when you wrote your first draft."

Yippie yi Yaaaaay
Morale so lowwwww
Ghost writers in the sky

The auditor sat pondering as he sat in a daze,
And realized he'd made his mind up and he was amazed.
Eternity spent writing things that never got issued
Would actually be better than the rewrites he had due.
 
Yippie yi Yaaaaay
I wanna beeeee
A Ghost Writer in the Sky

Posted on Apr 5, 2013 by Mike Jacka

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